Friday, August 27, 2010

cycles and full moons

My cycle - my menstrual cycle that is - has fallen in line with the moon cycle. Every full moon for the last 4 months I have started my period. The full moon always plays havoc with my psyche anyway - add hormonal influences into the mix as well... and well its an interesting result to say the least. I get cranky, and irritable, and restless, and moody, and irrational, and teary.... not very pleaseant to be around altogether really.

On Tuesday morning I woke up with a cracking headache, that I had gone to sleep with the previous night. My periphal vision was on the way out.. which meant that a migraine was on its way. Light and noise were hurting my head, and I felt bloody lousy. All I wanted to do was get back into bed.... but the life of a single mummy with three children means that you have to make sure everyone else is ok FIRST before climbing back into bed. So I muddle through, my vision getting harder and harder to focus... got A to daycare, went straight to the chemist, got some Myersondal, and drove home, all the time thinking "I don't think I should be driving". Took two tablets and crawled back into bed - it was 9.45 by this time... I woke at 1.45... head hurting less and just that dreggy feeling of after having a migraine - get up go to the toilet, and yay!... period arrives.

talking about adding insult to injury!

Mr Darcy had asked to see me again this Wednesday, and I hadn't heard from him... which was pissing me off no end in my highly emotive state. After sending him a text, and attempting to call him to find out if we were catching up or not on Tuesday, I sent him a text on Wednesday morning telling him that he had perfecting being rude into a fine art, and that if was trying to piss Vicky off he has successfully succeeded!! about 15mins later my mobile rang - but as I was on the land line I didn't hear it, until A arrived in front of me with it... so i just text him saying Yes? You called? and kept getting A ready for daycare. On the way to drop him off, my mobile rang again, and it was Mr D.

We ended up meeting at Montville for lunch. I desperately needed to get out of the house and have a change of scenery. Apparently (mmmmm...) he had text me, and I hadn't recieved them.... He was most apologetic - and I told him he could buy me lunch!!! It ended up being a very lovely afternoon. Had lunch at the Poet's Cafe - my favourite cafe, and strolled around the shops in Montville. For right now I'm happy to see him when it suits me...

It's N's birthday tomorrow - he is 12.... N's birthday is always a very odd time for me... because of all that was going on around his birth - my relationship with his father was well and truly on the demise, I was in the midst of PTSS and Acute Anxiety, but not yet diagnosed... it was a pretty horrible time. Most of the first 18months of N's life is all a blur....

N's birthday also marks the first of the events of the next few months that I would quite happily just go to sleep for... from the 21st August until the 5 Jan I would like to hibernate.... But unfortunately that isn't an option... so I will suck it up and do N's birthday, father's day, R's birthday, A's birthday , christmas, then L's birthday... will go into automatic response mode I think............

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